A Modern Christian Mystics Diary

June 30, 2023

I believe I understand now why I saw my "Angel Cop" as I call him. I truly believe it was my Guardian Angel showing me that he is not remote, that he is not just a statue, and that simply because I haven't dreamed with him recently doesn't mean he isn't with me, following me in all my doings.
The sight of him occurred on my usual weekly route home from the grocery store, which happens in the morning after I go to Mass and receive the Eucharist. In my mind's eye I can still see him (and will never forget) in the same vivid, mysteriously indelible way I remember the times I've seen my Angel in a dream; the memory is absolutely vivid and never fades. 

The event occurred just a few blocks from my home. I turned off a main road onto a side road where I could see some work was being done because one or two police officers in black were stationed there slowing down the cars ahead of me. As I drove by them, making a slow sharp turn, I saw a lone police officer standing a few yards away on the right side of the road where it begins curving sharply left. I was already driving cautiously, but now I slowed down as much as I could without coming to a stop. The man stood perfectly motionless, but just by being there he was helping direct me in the way I should go. (Like our Guardian Angels who constantly direct us in the ways we should go in obedience to the Holy Spirit.) He was very close to my car as I drove slowly by (more slowly than I needed to so I could feast my eyes on him!) for I saw his face clearly. (My Angel is not remote; he is always right here with me.) He wore a red-and-gold vest, his hands resting in its pockets as he stood perfectly still, tall and erect, his head held high yet only subtly so for he looked perfectly relaxed. He was fair-skinned and his blonde hair was neither short or long. He was extraordinarily beautiful yet completely masculine, and a subtly gratified smile enhanced his classically sculpted features. I was relatively close to him as I drove by, taking my eyes off the road as I should not have done in those moments. If he had turned his head, he would have seen me staring at him in awestruck wonder and admiration.

I can understand now why I was shown a police officer such as I have never seen before in all my life. Whether he was actually a manifested Angel, or a mortal man who in those moments was serving as a messenger on behalf of my heavenly Guardian doesn't really matter. I will most likely never know, at least not until I die. But the fact is he was and remains a waking vision I will never forget; I will always remember him as vividly as I do all the dreams I have experienced with my Guardian Angel, but with a sharp edge of reality I have no doubt is significant, and the whole point really.
The closer I draw to God the closer He draws to me. The saints prove it and the mystics proclaim it. 

Jesus said to Gabrielle Bossis, "Supernaturalize everything" and I can't imagine a command it gives me more joy to obey! I really do believe my Angel blessed me with this "Angel Cop" experience so that now, whenever I think about my beautiful Guardian (constantly) he doesn't remain confined to the dream space; he really is right here with me, always close to me. For years I've believed this mentally and spiritually, but now I feel it. He truly is close at hand, and the nearer I grow to God, the closer my Angel and I can become, and the more fruitfully I can obey all his directions on the roads of this mortal life. AMEN

P.S. 1

On the left side of the street where I saw the Angel Cop there is a statue of Jesus in someone's backyard, while on the right side there are only trees. Just after I drive by the statue is when I turn right onto the road leading to my home. On the morning I saw the Angel cop the statue was on my left (although not yet visible to me) and a few yards away from this striking police officer. Jesus, clad in a white-and-red robe and facing the street, is standing with his arms open wide. Directly behind him there is what appears to be an open seashell, as though a statue of Mary once stood behind Him but is gone now. The statue of Jesus is also apparently very old because the paint is more than a little faded, and the carving itself is somewhat eroded. 

P.S. 2

I should also mention that before I turn onto this special stretch of road is where I always begin playing the hymn I love most dearly. Then as soon as I turn right onto the road leading home (just after passing the statue of Jesus on my left) I slow down, and if it's a sunny day I lean forward so the sun's light catches the cross ring on my left index finger. The hymn is about the women who go to the tomb early in the morning, ". . . The faithful women went their way to see the tomb where Jesus lay! Alleluia! Alleluia! Alleluia!"

P.S. 3

The next time I drove this way, when I turned onto that now forever special stretch of road, I immediately noticed the Christ statue had been moved further up the yard and onto higher ground, with two tall neatly trimmed bushes framing it like living columns. And then I noticed something new . . . Right next to the road and perched on the end of a short stone wall there was now a relatively large statue of a white swan. After nearly seven years of the Christ statue being in the same exact place, with no swan in sight, directly after I saw my Angel Cop a decided effort was suddenly made to improve the look of the yard and it's key feature, the statue of Jesus, now properly and respectfully placed and framed. How can I not see this as totally gloriously meaningful?! It seems to mirror and confirm how my soul has experienced its own wondrous mystical upgrade! In Christianity, the swan embodies Grace and Salvation.

P.S. 4

Since my unforgettable "Angel cop" day, I have three times seen police officers and workmen in the same general vicinity, once at the same stretch of road, and at least two more times on the main road leading to it. On the latter two occasions the men wore vests, but they were very different from the vest worn by my Angel Cop; much thinner and lightweight and entirely yellow. The vest my Angel cop wore was red and yellow and much more substantial. Not to mention that in neither of these various groups of police officers was there a single man in the bunch possessed of any even remotely similar PRESENCE, much less any noticeable and much less overwhelmingly striking powers of attraction.

P.S. 5

Every time I recall this experience, I see only my Angel cop as vividly as ever mysteriously surrounded by darkness. I didn't see the trees lining the road behind him and wasn't aware of any sound at all. For intense moments he and I seemed to be alone in a featureless darkness in which his extraordinarily beautiful face shone like a sentient star in my eyes. I distinctly recall sensing this Angelic police officer was aware of my rapt attention focused on him (instead of on the road where it should have been) and both then and now I felt and still feel there was a mysterious pleasure mingled with his officially neutral expression.

P.S. 6

Last but definitely not least: This Angelic police officer bore a remarkable resemblance to the statue of an Angel I have owned and treasured for many years. He kneels in the backyard (a few feet away from my statue of Saint Francis) his hands crossed over his chest, his head slightly lowered, a gentle smile on his lips. And now whenever I kneel beside him and gaze at his profile, his smile speaks even more eloquently to my heart, silently affirming that because I have faith that the Holy Angels aren't merely statues, and that my uniquely special God-given Guardian is very real indeed, the Holy Spirit granted me a glorious glimpse of just how close to me he always truly is.

August 17, 2023 - Gloriously More of my Angel Cop

This morning, walking to Mass, as the Church came into view and the bells began ringing, I saw a hawk flying in the direction of the silvery early morning sun. It felt like a gift. I can't say a "little" gift, for no such synchronicities that mean so much to me personally are in any respect little. As Jesus urged Gabrielle to do with regard to the intimate reality of their relationship, I supernaturalize everything. Then, as I drove to the grocery store, I thought about my Angel cop, and lightheartedly filled with joy recalled how in my dream The Mysterious Hotel, my Guardian Angel asked the small group of fellow Angels around him, "Who is this Cuban?" And today I replied out loud, "I'm your Cuban!" Then after a few moments added hopefully, joyfully, "Heaven's coming for me and I'm running to meet it!"

On the way home, as I turned on to that most special of roads - approaching and then driving along the curving stretch where I had seen my Angel cop standing - as overhead clouds swiftly began gathering I looked up   . . . and there was the Sun's shining silver disc totally and safely visible to my naked eye. I honestly can't remember the solar disc ever before appearing to me with such a solid-looking gleaming intensity as my eyes remained as wide open as my heart with joy and awe. It was like glimpsing my Guardian Angel's shield and my Angel cop's divine silver badge! What joy!

“Blessed indeed are those who find God’s message in everyday life. Those who require no compelling proofs, but who know that everything coming from God must remain in a certain ultimate suspense, so that Faith may never cease to require daring… What comes from God touches gently, comes quietly, does not disturb freedom, and leads to quiet, profound, peaceful resolve within the heart. And those are called blessed who make the effort to remain openhearted… who are quick to hear, humble, and free-spirited. Those are called blessed who are able to find God’s message… in the happenings of everyday life which always end up the same way: work and rest, anxiety and then again some kind of success, some joy, an encounter… Blessed are those who can see the Lord in all these things!”

– Romano Guardini, The Inner Life of Jesus
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